


Unexpected Comforts

by AceQueenKing



Category: Hades (Video Game 2018)
Genre: Comfortween, Ficlet Collection, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Warnings in individual chapters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:53:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26860027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AceQueenKing/pseuds/AceQueenKing
Summary: Ficlets written for Comfortween in October focusing on the house of Hades and the complicated relationships found therein. Mostly gen.Second: Zagreus runs to his mother after a lesson with his father goes badly, and learns a hard lesson early, despite all Nyx's attempts to comfort him.
Relationships: Hades & Nyx (Hades Video Game), Hades & Zagreus (Hades Video Game), Nyx & Zagreus (Hades Video Game)
Comments: 17
Kudos: 158
Collections: Comfortween 2020





	1. [Nyx + Hades] Forewarning

**Author's Note:**

> In every chapter, I'll have common trigger/squick warnings at the top here.
> 
> Warnings for this chapter: breastfeeding

The underworld had no concept of time, but Nyx knew it was very late indeed when Hades knock upon her door. She knew it was him from the monotone _rap-rap-rap_ ; insistent, but even. Such was the knocking of a man who had eternity at his fingertips. The squalling of their newest resident, the crown prince, also alerted her; she rolled her eyes. With luck, Zagreus wouldn't set off Thanatos and Hypnos. At least Hypnos would likely go back to sleep. Thanatos was always trickier.

She swept the night from around her, gently glided to the doorway. The knocking grew louder; she quirked a brow. Unusual, that. Hades was a lot of things. Panicked was rarely if ever one of them.

She opened the door and immediately the bulk of the underworld's king swept into her chambers; his large face and piercing red eyes completely, utterly _terrified_. The wailing, twisting, clearly inconsolable infant in his arms likely indicated why.

"He won't _shut up_ ," Hades babbled, sounding—despite his status as God of the underworld—like nothing but a scared new father _._ Nyx plucked the squalling prince from his father's arms, gently wrapping him up in her own. She frowned as she felt the heat of his skin as he snuggled against her neck. Hades, clearly exhausted, settled down upon her divan, his large form almost comical in comparison to the divan's spindly frame. His eyes did not leave the boy on her shoulder.

"Has he been fussy?" She gently wiped his nose, felt snot - not surprising, when the boy had clearly been squalling for hours on end. Even on her shoulder, he was still crying.

"He has not _ceased_ bawling since he awoke." She rolled her eyes at the disapproval in his voice. Hades was too strict in his demands as to how an infant should behave; the disappearance of the mother had bled the last of Hades' softness out of him. She'd have to spoil Zagreus a bit as he grew older, to help counterbalance the iron that was Hades' natural temperament. "Is your magic...?" He could not get the last word out, and instantly her criticism of the man evaporated to nothing but ash on her tongue.

"No." She stroked the prince's unruly hair—his fathers, that, and she would have counted it a pity had she not known that anything the boy had that reminded Hades of his mother was more than likely to be held against Zagreus. Best, perhaps, to have those unmanageable black waves. "You have no fear of that. Look at his feet. They still burn."

He nodded, and she caught the wide swallow of his adam's apple as he did; relief, though he'd never name it such. He held out his arms and she shifted the boy back to him, watched as Hades gently touched both his feet. Still burning; she could only pray such would warm his heart. "How you worry me, boy," he said. For him, the admission was more emotion than he'd shown since Persephone had left them alone here. Three months in, she supposed she should be happier that he had not thus far collapsed or completely repudiated the boy. 

"He is more god than mortal," she said, trying to comfort both father and child.

"He is mortal enough." His voice was biting, and she knew, the blood of the boy; Persephone's fault, that, and one they were left to tend to without her. His blood spilled red, and she knew Hades would continue to obsess about it as the boy grew older, more precocious, and inevitably hurt himself, as all children did. The fire and the magic ought to have left him immortal enough, but the red blood would always mark him with his mortal origins.

"Were he to pass, he would simply drift through the pools of the Styx until you found him." She ran a finger down Zagreus cheek, and the infant turned toward her; hungry. He would take milk, she knew. "You know this to be true. It is a cold, and likely nothing more than that. I will give him more milk, you will hold him. And this shall pass. Give him here."

He said nothing; he looked away as she opened her dress, and she took the boy to her breast. Zagreus suckled hungrily, and she felt a guilty pang that it was her who was left to feed the boy, and not Persephone, who had so wanted him. Hades had forced her to swear a binding oath not to contact Persephone, thinking her better off without the house; Nyx was not entirely sure that would hold true, but such sworn promises were irrevocable. She could not take it back. She could only rue the mistake. If he shared his father's bound fate, it may well be a mercy to let Persephone remain blissfully ignorant of the child she could never see.

"He eats well; a good sign." She gently brushed his hair from his eyes; red and green both glared at her, the gaze hungry. "He will live, Hades."

"Hmph." The father did not seem fit to find it worth replying to. He shifted his head low, purposefully keeping his gaze a respectful distance. "I am...much obliged for your assistance. As in so many things."

"Merely good timing." The boy sucked down his drink with a lusty desire; thirsty. Poor little thing. Zagreus was only a few weeks younger than her own sons. She did not mind being his wet nurse, not in the strange circumstances that they had found themselves in. "He'll always have friends of his age."

"He would be dead without such timing." The lord of the dead sighed with the weight of his station evident in the exhale. "She should not have left."

Nyx said nothing, focusing instead on the little one. This was already an old argument, and there was little she could say. The mother had left them; Nyx understood why. The pain of stillbirth had broken apart many couples; if Hades had perhaps been less stubborn, would have admitted to trying to bring the boy back—well. She could understand, too, why he had not. It had hardly been guaranteed to succeed. It may well have hurt them both far worse had the fire and the spell failed to enkindle life in the boy. 

"We could send word," she said, cautiously, knowing already how he would bat such away. The boy finished his meal, disengaging; she shifted him to her shoulder, gently tapping his back. "If you'd like, we could wri—"

" _No_ ," he said, angrily. She did not argue. That, too, was already an old argument, and she knew it would become more so. "You are the closest thing to a mother he has, now."

"Then we will manage as we must." There was a new argument there: whether to have the boy call her mother by name or merely in deed, but Hades was still far too focused on Persephone's absence to consider such discussions. She would be patient. It would be months before the boy would need an answer, and it mattered little to her how she would be reckoned; she would love the boy regardless.

"Is there anything we could do to...." There was a long pause. She did not anticipate the end of his sentence and thus simply waited for him to come to his own terms to be able to ask his question. The boy gurgled at her shoulder, she smiled and tapped at his back some more. Zagreus continued to grumble, oblivious to his father's distress, but such was the way of children so young.

"Shorten the illness...?" He looked at her then, and she held out the boy. He took him back. Nyx tried not to notice that the boy bellowed louder on his shoulder, despite his father patiently tapping his back in the same familiar motion, if perhaps with a less gentle hand then her own.

"I am afraid there is little you can do short of holding him for comfort." She squeezed his shoulder, knowing the news was not what he wished. "If you wish to leave the boy here so you may have some sleep, you may." Hypnos certainly wouldn't awaken; Thanatos might, but she doubted she would get much sleep anyway, now. Leaving Zagreus with her would make her morning feeding easier; generally, she simply made herself available to take the boy every few hours, giving him his meal before returning him to sleep drowsily in the bassinet next to his father's desk, watched over by Cerberus. 

But Hades, being himself, seemed ill-content to take the easy course.

"We will go," he said. "We have taken enough of your comfort."

That, she knew, was not true, but she squeezed his arm and said nothing more on the topic. They were gods. They had an eternity to discuss the future.

"Safe travels," she said, though it was hardly a strenuous journey from his chambers to hers. "I'll see you in a few hours."

"With luck, he will have ceased his squalling by then," he said, but the ire had gone out of the statement.

"Patience," she murmured. He gave her a look that suggested nothing so much as exhaustion, if less despairing exhaustion than when he'd arrived. She saw the truth he himself feared to admit in those red eyes: _he did not think he would be doing this alone_. 

Perhaps, in time, he would be wise enough to realize he was _not_ doing this alone.

She watched father and son as they left, Zagreus little arms flailing against his father's chest, and something within her tightened. She was not a fate herself but could not shake the idea that she was watching fate as it took its course. She pondered on such for a long moment, but then Thanatos burst into life with a loud wail, and she busied herself in carrying for him, and let her attention drift to other family matters.


	2. Pride and Pain [Nyx & Zagreus, Zagreus & Hades, Hades & Nyx]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written for comfortween prompt #2: Comfort Media  
> \- Movie night, Netflix and comfort, sleep overs. 
> 
> Since the first two don't exist in canon, I opted for the third. XD
> 
> rating: T  
> Warning: nothing really, some hints of generational abuse but nothing severe

There was a knock upon her door, and Nyx's stomach sank as she realized who it must be. There were few choices: her daughters were at work, save Meg; Charon, too, was on the river, and Thanatos, Meg and Hypnos were sitting down to dinner. It could not be Hades, the knocks were rapid, a fast and desperate staccato that the king could never allow himself to be so vulnerable as to hit.

Which left only one person in all the underworld it could be. One boy who she knew perfectly well had gone out with his father not half an hour before. And there he was as she opened the door, true to form, his father's chin held high on his little face. A face that was scrunched up and trying desperately to retain his pride so that he would not cry.

Dammit. Blood and damnation, as Hades would say.

"Zagreus," she said, opening the door.

Zagreus stared at her. His eyes were red, and she knew there that whatever mistakes Hades had made, they were clearly numerous in number and deeply upsetting. It was a problem that was happening more often, these days, and one even Nyx was struggling to handle.

"Can I come in, momma?" Zagreus asked, and her heart broke, as it always did when he asked such. She had agreed for the sake of father and son bonding that it would be best that the boy lived with Hades, but the hunger in his voice for a bit of tenderness— what could she do but reach out and hug him?

She pulled him tight into her arms, frowning as she swept her hands through his hair. Zagreus leaned into it, his unruly black hair tangling in her fingers. "Weren’t you supposed to be sparring with your father?" she asked gently. She'd talk to Hades, but best to get Zagreus' side before she did.

"Oh, we’re finished." Zagreus smiled up at her with a goofy smile—that, he got from Persephone. Hades neither lied nor had the where-with-all to try to make the lie more appealing. So far as she was aware Hades had told all of one lie in his many days, and that was the lie that they had both agreed to keep.

"So soon?" She gently pushed back on him and Zagreus pressed his head further into her belly. He murmured something soft into her skin, so soft only the night itself could hear it whispering in the breeze.

"Not soon enough," he said, in that quiet little voice, and how her heart hurt at the sound of him.

"Zagreus, my boy." She sighed, pet his hair more. He needed the affection, needed it badly. His starvation of it was entirely the fault of the most prideful man in the universe, his father; the tragedy doubled-down in Zagreus having inherited such pride, and not even being able to ask for such badly needed comfort. She stared down at him and thought: _you are too much like your father_. And the mother as well, unknown to him but still present in his blood. The hopeful look Zagreus gave her was purely Persephone: excited eyes, a charming smile.

"Please?" Like Meg and her sisters, Zagreus had some traits he has taken from her, as well, and the calm way he said this, despite his obvious desperation, was proof that she'd left some mark on him. A good boy, theirs; careful. Deliberate.

She nodded, jerked her head toward the kitchens. "Of course. Meg's watching your brothers. Tell Meg to give you some dinner, and then you can go play with Than and Hypnos. I’ll be back in a moment."

Her boy—not hers, but hers all the same—smiled at her, his little face breaking into such happiness that it squeezed at her heart. She could hear Thanatos excitedly shouting "Zag!" as she gently closed the door and smiled sadly; they would be fine. And at least the twins would be good company and lift his spirits. 

Zagreus needed that.

* * *

It did not take her long to find the father. Hades was still in the courtyard, cleaning up the detritus of a practice session rapidly abandoned. From the looks of what had been laid out, Hades had not gotten even a tenth through the weaponry he wanted to cover: dirks, daggers, swords, an ax, a pole-ax, three bows, an old rail-gun, and several shields lay out, untouched. He was muttering under his breath, and she knew his anger must be most foul indeed.  
  
"Do you want me to call Dusa?" She asked, trying to help dissipate his anger. She picked up a dagger, studied it: sharp, old. He'd broken out some of the real good stuff for this. Which would make sense, were his trainee not a mere seven-year-old boy.

"No. And before you begin, I don’t want to talk about it." His voice was furious, and Nyx rolled her eyes. He was too angry. Too angry at the boy, and too angry at himself, at his completely unreasonable standards.

"He came to my home. Meg's watching him. He's playing with Thanatos and Hypnos." He at least deserved to know where his son was.

"I said I did not wish to hear about it." He tossed a shield down onto the ground. "Fire and damnation, woman, do you ever listen?"

"You know that I do." She folded her arms, leaned against a wall. She would not help him put things away if he was going to be in this sour a mood. Hades tended to busy himself when he was so upset, and perhaps he found such soothing. She waited a long moment for him to get his infamous temper under control.

"He's too slow," he said, finally. "The boy. Needs to be quicker. Keep his mind in battle." She said nothing. There was another long beat as he busied himself clearing more of the wasted tools. "I told him as such. But he takes criticism so poorly."

He was not the only one. She gave him a stern look. Hades looked away.

"I know you think I am too harsh upon the boy." He waved a hand. "But if they find out, Olympus won't be merciful. To us, or to him."

"And yet you think nothing of your seven-year-old boy storming off through the underworld alone?" She raised an eyebrow. "You did not pursue him?"

"Would it have helped?" He gave her a side-eyed glare before grabbing some of the swords, putting them back in the weapon rack.

"...It frightens me that you did not care to know where he was." And the sharp words, too, but unlike Hades, she knew to only bring up one subject at a time. "Your own son."

Hades turned toward her, sheer fury on his face. "Where else would he run but to you?"

Nyx raised an eyebrow. "I'll not apologize for offering him a place where he feels welcome."

He winced, and she caught the brief crumple in his face, the pain he carried always. It was frustrating, watching the two of htem constantly butt heads. She did not know how to fix it. She could only try to keep them from killing one another, and hope that they would soften in regard to one another. It was his fault, but she knew that did not make it less painful.

And there were scars that ran through them both that neither had caused.

“Hades...” She murmured. She crossed over to him, gently grabbed his hand.

“It is natural,” he said, softly, and broke away from her hand, staring toward her. “For a boy to run to his mother.”

The truth, in so far as Zagreus knew it. Hades, she knew, had never had a mother who tended to him so.

“I am glad to provide a place for him to go to.” The truth, as she knew it. “I care for him as I would for any of my own.”

Hades sighed, walked away from her with a shield in hand. He fussed for several moments about getting it hung up perfectly straight; she waited.

“I am grateful,” he said, finally. “That you have...” He still would not look at her. He raised his arm and dropped it, as if unable to say the width of what she had offered. Perhaps he could not. Hades always had his damnable pride.

“As I said. I am glad to provide.” And she was. She loved the boy as she loved her own. He was her son, too; by fiat, if not by blood.

She took a few steps forward, pivoting from the brambles to the nettles in unwinding the problems that had happened that morning. “And as his mother, I have to tell you—”

“Let’s have it then.” Hades folded his arms, already defensive from the first word on. Not a good omen, but she persisted onwards.

“You’re being too hard on him. You cannot expect him to be a flawless warrior from the first day he picks up a shield.” She smiled and tried to remind the father of earlier times. “You yourself struggled with it, once upon a time, and with considerably more dire circumstances to motivate you.”

Hades gave her a withering stare. He never liked it when she brought up his own youth; such seemed best forgotten in his view.

But she did not think, deep down, that he had forgotten at all. The titans had left scars on him, as they had on many.  
  
“The boy has to be prepared to take to his duties. Even if there may be, as you say, _dire_ circumstances.”

“He is only a child.”

“He won’t always be.”

She reached out to grab his hand, but Hades shrugged it away again. He did not wish to be comforted, it seemed. “Hades.”

Hades shrugged, defensive. “It is my job to prepare him. For life. For battle, if need be.”

There was a point, Nyx thought, where the man’s commitment to duty became fanaticism. It was not as if war were yet on their doorstep – and not much the boy could do, were it to be. Even if he were the best warrior in an age, a seven-year-old simply was not capable of being a great military leader.

“He is a _boy_. You need to allow him to have a childhood.” Hades, perhaps, had not had one, or much of one: what the titans had done to their children bordered on great cruelty. But he had seen her raise her children long enough to know how helpful it was.

He whirled back to face her, anger plain in the scrowl on his face. “Do you think for one _second_ Olympus will allow him that? If they find out about his mother...you know the game we are playing here. You know the stakes.”

“I know.” Nyx came forward. She placed her hand on his shoulder. This time, he did not shrug it off. “Believe me, I know.”

Hades sighed. “Demeter would be well within in her rights to demand him.” Nyx paused: the thought had not occurred to her. She did have a claim by blood, but a grandparent’s claim was weaker than a parents, and Persephone herself, she thought, would likely risk exposure to the Olympians if it meant preventing her son from being as love-starved as she herself had once been. But there was no bringing up Persephone without him flying into a rage, and they were still having most of this conversation with his back turned as it was!

“I don’t believe your brother will allow that.” Zeus and Hades had fallen out, but it had been over Hades’ protest as the mother’s treatment. Zeus was unlikely to hold such against him. But mentioning it made Hades only angrier, the grunt of disapproval her only warning before he whipped himself around, staring down at her with a terrible fury.

“She’s freezing the entire world for want of one woman. Zeus is a practical man. What is one boy to...?”

He couldn’t restrain himself; Hades picked up the pole-ax, staring at it sadly for a long moment. “He’s just a boy to my brother. Just a boy. Not _his_ boy. _My_ boy.” His voice broke, the pitch odd, obviously distressed; he shook his head, unable to finish the thought.

And it was obvious, in the unsaid, what he thought: that Zeus would gladly barter him away, that Zeus would give the grandson to Demeter if he could not deliver the daughter, that Zagreus would be raised in the frozen ice palace of Demeter’s heart and that Hades would see him nevermore, could not even hope to fight for him on the surface. She saw all that in his eyes, and it wounded her.

“Hades.” His eyes darted to hers, and they were stricken, vulnerable in a way he rarely was. She reached up and placed her hands on his cheeks. She took a deep breath, hoping he would mirror and calm with her.

“If it comes to war, you know you will have every weapon in the underworld unleashed for you. Mine included.”

Hades seemed unconvinced; he nodded, took his own deep breath. Good, good. Calm. Nyx had learned in her long life that there was little point in getting so upset; Hades, despite being almost as old, had somehow missed this lesson. And as such it pained her to suggest what needed to be said, knowing it would give him pain.

“Have you considered, Hades, that the boy you are fighting so hard to keep may wish to go, if you continue to push him so hard?”

Hades looked away from her, gently put the pole-ax back against the wall. There was truth in her statements, and even he could not deny it, no matter how much he did not wish to deal with it.

“What would you have me do, Nyx?” It was rare for the man to take direction from her, but she was glad to hear of it.

“Let him be a boy. Let him stay with me tonight. In the morning, I’ll return him, and you will give him a relaxing day to bond with you. Whatever he likes. You will do it with him.” It was simple, as a plan, but it would work, she knew: Zagreus was young enough to be thankful for the change of course, and all Hades would have to do would be to somehow enjoy a day of rest and respite. He was most surely due for such anyway.

“But—” But Hades being Hades, he could not handle such an easy assignment without fighting on it.

Nyx silenced him with a potent jab of her finger.

“I can handle overseeing the realm for a day.”

Hades frowned. “That was not the reason—”

“It’s important. If you want him to fight for you, he needs a reason.” She waved her arm out in a wide sweep, as if to illustrate how widely he had missed the mark. “Give him a reason.”

Hades scratched his chin, then placed his hands upon his hips. “Do as you wish,” he said, finally, a phrase that indicated acknowledgment of her plan but not acceptance.

“Then, are we agreed?” She pressed him on it. He grunted; he should not be surprised that Nyx saw through such a sorry charade.

“...Yes. Damn you. Would that providing for the boy all his life be enough!” And therein was the true fault, she suspected: Hades had had so meager a childhood, he could not understand the boy’s perfectly normal desire for a father to demonstrate some affection for him.

Still, she had to hope. She had given him the instructions. He needed only to put them into practice.

“You will see. Be patient and give him time. He will blossom faster with kindness than discipline. All living things do.”

He looked frustrated, but she could offer him no further succor. The living may be a mystery to the lord of the dead, but he would have to learn. With a flutter of her cape as she turned her back, she was gone, leaving him to contemplate his fatherhood alone.

* * *

The boys’ loud voices greeted her as she made her way back the short distance between Zagreus’ courtyard and her own apartments.

“It’s my turn, Than!” Zagreus shouted. “Megaera said it’s my turn!”  
  
“You already went. It’s not our fault that your marble spilled down the steps!”

“So did yours, Than!” So many marbles to retrieve; such was the fate of a mother.

“Guys, why are we fighting? We can all share my marble, it’s fine. I’ll just take a nap on your turn!” Hypnos, she smiled; as ever a sweetheart.

None of the boys seemed to see her as she slipped into the apartment. She leaned against the wall and cleared her throat; slowly, all three turned to her, and none smiled brighter than Zagreus.

“MAMA!” All three quickly discarded their marbles, running up to embrace her.

“Ah, my boys.” She kissed each of them on the tip of their head. Each had a different reaction: Hypnos gave her the sleepy beatific smile he always had, Zagreus looked as if he wanted fifty more, and Thanatos gave her his usual wince at anything so silly as to suggest he _might_ be a child. Meg wasn’t in the room but she could hear her muttering over some part of her work day in the background, still trying to shake whatever had happened earlier.

“Back, Meg!” She called; there was a rather unimpressed _hi_ somewhere in the distance. She smiled; a full house, tonight. TIsi and Alecto would no doubt return after their duties. She turned her attention to Zagreus, knowing she would have to uphold her part of the bargain and return Zagreus to a happy state before he went back to his father’s house for their day tomorrow. “Zagreus, would you like to stay with us tonight?”

She saw the light that sparked in his eyes, and how quickly he blinked it away and a new, more depressing emotion replaced it: fear.

“Father probably won’t—” he muttered, and Nyx interrupted her son, quick to try to stomp that difficulty before it grew too large.

“I’ve already asked. He’s fine with it.”

“Yes!” Zagreus pumped his arm in child-like joy, then froze, his eyes growing wide as he thought about it. “Wait, you talked to him?”

And how clearly he expected punishment from it broke her heart. She patted his head, nodded, and let it pass without comment.

Hypnos looked up at her, a little bit of mischief in his eyes evident. “Does this mean we can have some of that saffron cake? Being a sleepover and all?”

She smiled. She’d intended to give them the saffron cake today anyway, but she put on a show, pretending to mull over such a decision. “Hmm...”

“Please?” Thanatos’ voice was still stern, even when he was begging for a sweet treat. She grinned. Even if she had not intended to give it to them, she could not resist giving this to her boys.

“I suppose!” She put her hand on Thanatos’ shoulder. “Go get Meg. You know she’s got quite a sweet tooth.”  
  
Thanatos nodded, serious as always. She had no doubt he and Megaera would work well as a team together when Thanatos was grown.

With one child occupied, she turned to the other two. “Now, Hypnos, get the bowls. Zagreus, you’ll have to help me mix the glaze for it. And if any of it falls on your fingers, you’ve got to lick it off, alright?”

Zagreus shot her the happiest look she’d seen today on his face, a big wide smile that reminded her of no one; perhaps it would have been Hades, but the man rarely smiled, and certainly never so wide. “Yes, mama!”  
  
“That’s my boy.” Nyx ruffled his hair as she pulled down the sugar and poured it into her bowl with a bit of water from a nearby jug. She hummed with happiness as handed Zagreus the spoon to mix the sugar and water together. It would work out alright. She was sure of it.

* * *

It had taken the boys a long time before they’d tucked themselves out enough to go to bed. Zagreus she had tucked into Charon’s old bed; he’d moved out to his own apartments now, but Nyx could never bear the thought that her child might not have a place to sleep, and thus the bed had conveniently remained available for Zagreus to occupy whenever he wished. Zagreus had taken the longest to fall asleep; she had read him two stories before his eyes had become drowsy.

But he had slept, and no longer seemed upset, so she chalked both up to a victory. Nyx treated herself to a cup of tea, sipping it and enjoy the darkness of the underworld as she relaxed before her own slumber.

There was a noise from one of the boy’s rooms; she raised an eyebrow as Zagreus opened the door. “Zagreus.”

“Mama?” Zagreus looked sleep, but troubled; she could see anxiety scrunched up in that little face and patted the cushion next to her.

“Come here, Zagreus.” Zagreus’ little feet padded over to the table. He was clearly troubled, every bit of his little body screamed it: the tension in those little shoulders, the hands clasped behind his back until he reached the couch. Slowly, he raised himself up onto her couch, a small frown on his face. She wrapped an arm around him, drawing him close to her.

“Tell me, my child. What troubles you so?”

Zagreus looked up, an innocent hope on his face so blazingly pure that she knew what he would ask seconds before he did. The words tore apart her heart regardless.

“Can I come live with you, mama?”  
  
Nyx winced; gently squeezed Zagreus’ hands. Such was impossible. Hades would never permit his baby to be raised in a house not his own, and she could not blame him. Zagreus was, in a way, her son, but he was not, in blood, her son, and Hades had but one child in all the world. She could not even ask him. Such was not fair to them.

“What brought this on?” She thumbed Zagreus’ hair, tried to think of a gentler answer while she stalled for time. If she knew his child-logic, it would be easier to untangle it, to show him why he needed to remain with his father.

“Well, Meg lives with you, and Tisi, and Alecto, and Thana and Hyp. And you’re my momma, too, and Char’s moved out, so...” Like his father, Zagreus was observant. Fortunate in many senses, but not this.

“I suppose that is true.” She was careful to praise his logic: it had been well-formed. She rubbed his back to try to soothe the strike she had to give him next. She could not allow him to hold onto hope that he could stay; such would be cruel to them all. “While I have many children, my love, your father has only you. He loves you very much, Zagreus. It would break his heart, if you moved here. I couldn’t do that to him.”

Zagreus pressed himself further into her side. “Doesn’t love me,” he muttered into her chest, then, his courage gathered, he looked up at her and all but shouted it. “He doesn’t love me _at all!_ ”

“Zagreus! I promise you, Zagreus, your father loves you.” Zagreus looked at her skeptically. Such a sharp little boy! Her heart felt pride and pain in equal measure. She squeezed his hand. “Though I admit, he is poor at showing it at times.”

“I want to live with you, mama. He doesn’t like living with me. He just yells at me, all the time!” Zagreus folded his arms tight around her. “He’s _mean!”_

And how her heart broke. Hades’ parents had beaten him within an inch of his small life; he had managed to avoid that sort of abuse of his own child, but had none the less given Zagreus his own scars. And there was so little way to explain why he had done this.

She had given her vow.

She felt a tear flow down her own cheek and pulled the boy closer to her. “Baby boy...”

“Don’t you love me, mamma?” Zagreus looked at her, those wide red and green eyes lit up with desperation, and hunger deeper than she had ever seen.

Nothing could stop her from holding him even tighter, and nothing could stop her tears from falling ever faster.

“Of course! My boy, I love you very much.” She kissed the top of his head. “So much.”

“I would be good! I wouldn’t make too much noise! I would study so hard!” So desperate, her boy. So desperate and so sad and it broke her heart. She would talk to Hades again after tomorrow; would _stress_ how badly Zagreus was hungering for parental love.

“Oh, my son, my son.” She kissed his forehead, again and again. “My son, my son.”

“Please? Please please _please_. It could be my birthday present.” So much desperation, so much. It was not good. Not good.

“I’m sorry, my child, but I cannot do that, no matter how much I want to.” How she hated to say it!

“I don’t want to go back.” Zagreus' voice was tiny now, small.

“You must.” She picked him up; he was close to an age when she could no longer do so, but she would today strain to try to comfort him, to hold him and console him. She walked back and forth in her living room, her little boy wrapped up in her arms.

“Please?” Zagreus mewled. He hit his fist against her shoulder; not hard enough to hurt anything but her heart, but it cracked her heart. Without words, she gently settled her head on top of his, and allowed the boy to rage against her.

“Please! It’s not fair! It’s not!”

“I am sorry, my boy. I am so, so sorry.” She could say nothing else; seemingly, neither could Zagreus, for he cried wordlessly into her neck from that point on, sobbing into her arms. Her tea forgotten, there was nothing she could do but hold him until he fell asleep.


End file.
